Answers to Life's Questions “How to Be Happy With Life? I Need a Process to Get Out of This Rut!”

“How to Be Happy With Life? I Need a Process to Get Out of This Rut!”


Q…

I want to change my life around and want to be where you are.  I want my children and husband to see the world with me, to live a much more stress free life and not be afraid that the mail is arriving or the mail has come for fear of bill collectors.

I have NO idea how “I” get to where you are from where “I” am.  Does that make sense?

Would you be willing to lend some of your knowledge to me?  I really need a hand up to get out of this rut of a life, I find myself in.  There has got to be a ‘better life out there for me and my family’.


A…

Such total life transformation can be overwhelming and yes, it can be hard to know where to begin.

Without knowing enough specifics about your life and particular goals or challenges, what we suggest you begin with right now is this…

Align yourself with people who are a level or more above where you are now, and on their way to where you want to be. They will be close enough to your current circumstances that you won’t feel intimidated or doubtful of yourself, and they’ll also be living their life and resonating in the exact kind of way that represents your first steps up from where you are toward where you want to be.

We suggest this for two reasons:

1You become who you hang around, and no book, course, monthly mentor or even weekly coach can compete with the people you spend most of your time with. So it’s important to add people and pastimes into your daily environment that resonate with the type of life you’re looking to create for yourself.

2Such people ~ whether they’re one step ahead of you or they’ve achieved exactly what you’re looking for ~ have a wealth of knowledge that you can benefit from. We’ll tell you what questions to ask them in a moment. Also study these people: their actions, interests, what they spend their time on etc. We are the sum of our habits to a large degree. If you model what they’re doing, you’ll receive what they’re getting too!

First, you have to get clarity about where you are and where you want to be exactly, so that you can identify the type of people you want to add into your life… so here’s a quick exercise.

Exercise #1: Identify Exactly Where You Are

Write down, just stream of conscious, everything that comes to you about what your life looks like right now.

  • What does it feel like?
  • What do you feel like?
  • What is your environment like right now, and the people in it?
  • How do you feel about them, and what do you think about them?
  • What do they feel and think about you?
  • What do you love, what do you want to get rid of, and what do you want to change?

Once you’ve explored and answered each of those questions, take a breather. If some difficult emotions or a sense of frustration or overwhelm came up, that’s okay.  Allowing such emotions helps us release them. Remember that you are not your feelings ~ and whatever comes up for you during this exercise can and will shift. Just accept what comes up.


Exercise #2: Identify Where You Want to Go ~ Your Ideal Life

When you’re ready, write a new summary of what your ideal life looks, feels, sounds and even smells like.

Get all your senses involved.

Describe your ideal environment, your ideal pace for living – how often do you travel and where are you traveling to? Stay in the present tense and for everything you describe feel into your body. How does it feel to live this life? What emotions come up? Who are the people in your life – how do they treat you and how do you treat them?


Now Slowly Transform Your Environment With New People Who Represent What You Want

Once you have all that, start seeking out people who represent your ideal life and the ideal you. And seek people who are clearly progressing to the type of life you desire ~ their momentum will rub off on you!

Learn from them, ask questions – not for help, but just ask them what books they read, what has inspired them most, what was the single most important event or experience they had that changed everything for them and put them on the path to where they are now? Ask who inspires them, how they spend their time, what websites they visit, what they find inspiring.

Successful people often share certain habits, perspectives, ways of living and seeing the world. When you learn what these are, you can start to incorporate them. Also pay attention to what these people normally talk about. Are they complaining about life or reveling in the little things? Are they watching the news or something else? What do they pay attention to?

You can find these people by following your passions and hobbies. Go to meetup groups for your interests. We also find such people at industry events and seminars, at yoga studios and art galleries. Get creative. And just getting out and living your interests and passions will have a positive effect on you and it doesn’t have to cost extra money. If you find you lack the time, substitute TV time or something else to make room.

By having these people in your life, you’ll begin to see patterns for living that you can emulate, and when you get confused, stuck or frustrated, you have friends and mentors you can now casually ask for advice.

Good luck!

~ Jaime & Angela



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